Thursday, November 11, 2010
A Very Serious Thoughtful Argument That Has Never Been Made In Such Detail Or With Such Care
So anyway, I was having a beer with a mate of mine on Tuesday and I notice that he is not wearing a watch. "Good sir", I blurted out, "I notice that you are not wearing a watch. What is the deal with that?" and he explained that due to the ubiquitousness of public clocks, mobile phones, PCs, etc, wristwatches are essentially obsolete.
That certainly got me thinking. Have watches really become obsolete? I guess in a sense they have - one can easily get by without them - but then again, it's possible to get through life with one pair of shoes, or underpants. You can do it, but where's the fun?
So here, in no particular order, are my reasons for owning a wristwatch:
1. Impressing the ladies. OK, to be honest I can't comment properly on this - women tend to be more impressed by my massive goiter than my moderately priced watch, but if you were a young man trying to pull, a Rolex may help you to some extent. Perhaps, I don't know. We really need someone with a Rolex and a massive goiter to write in and let us know which is more effective.
2. You don't have to rummage around in your pocket looking like you're "trying" to find change for a homeless person whenever you want to tell the time.
3. It's just so easy to hurl your phone angrily at paparazzi. And then it's gone. At least with a watch you have to take it off first, which buys you valuable seconds of "cooling off" time.
4. You can quickly check the time even when your hands are dripping with blood.
5. You look at your watch, yawn, and roll your eyes. Everyone knows what you're on about; you're bored! This loses something if you try it with (say) the cuckoo clock in the corner of the room, especially if you are standing too close and the cuckoo emerges while you have your mouth open.
6. It usually takes longer than 3 months before your watch becomes hopelessly dated.
7. They're just plain handsome. No-one but a sadist or madman would bequeath a Nokia or Mac to their kids.
That certainly got me thinking. Have watches really become obsolete? I guess in a sense they have - one can easily get by without them - but then again, it's possible to get through life with one pair of shoes, or underpants. You can do it, but where's the fun?
So here, in no particular order, are my reasons for owning a wristwatch:
1. Impressing the ladies. OK, to be honest I can't comment properly on this - women tend to be more impressed by my massive goiter than my moderately priced watch, but if you were a young man trying to pull, a Rolex may help you to some extent. Perhaps, I don't know. We really need someone with a Rolex and a massive goiter to write in and let us know which is more effective.
2. You don't have to rummage around in your pocket looking like you're "trying" to find change for a homeless person whenever you want to tell the time.
3. It's just so easy to hurl your phone angrily at paparazzi. And then it's gone. At least with a watch you have to take it off first, which buys you valuable seconds of "cooling off" time.
4. You can quickly check the time even when your hands are dripping with blood.
5. You look at your watch, yawn, and roll your eyes. Everyone knows what you're on about; you're bored! This loses something if you try it with (say) the cuckoo clock in the corner of the room, especially if you are standing too close and the cuckoo emerges while you have your mouth open.
6. It usually takes longer than 3 months before your watch becomes hopelessly dated.
7. They're just plain handsome. No-one but a sadist or madman would bequeath a Nokia or Mac to their kids.
